To Gram or Not to Gram… That Is the Question

If you’ve spent any time in dance parent groups lately, you’ve probably seen it all…

“Follow trains”
“Should I make my dancer an Instagram?”
And yes… even some strong opinions (okay, shaming 😅) about whether kids should be on social media at all.

So let’s talk about it. Honestly. From someone who’s been in it, learned from it, and is still figuring it out alongside my dancer.

Because like most things in the dance world… it’s not black and white.

Why Dance Social Media Exists in the First Place

Let’s start here.

I created Rachel’s dance Instagram back in the early 2020s after realizing something important:

👉 The industry is watching.

Whether it’s agents, choreographers, casting directors, or brands… social media has become a virtual resume.

Does that mean a traditional resume and headshot don’t matter anymore?
Absolutely not.

But you better believe… they’re going to look you up.

First Impression Tip (This Matters!)

If you’re going to have a public dance account:

• Make sure your first 3–6 posts on the grid reflect your dancer’s goals

  • Dance clips

  • Performance photos

  • Headshots or modeling shots

Because when someone clicks your profile… that first glance tells them everything.

So… Should You Make One?

Here’s the honest answer:

✔️ YES — if your dancer wants more

• Industry opportunities

• College dance programs

• Auditions, agents, casting

• Brand partnerships

❌ NO — if they’re just dancing for joy

And I mean that in the best way.

If your dancer is there for:

• Fun

• Friends

• Performances

Then you truly don’t need one.
And there is zero pressure to create one just because “everyone else is.”

Let’s Talk About Safety (Because This Is the Big One)

Yes… social media can be amazing.

And yes… the internet can also be a dumpster fire 🔥

Here’s how we’ve approached protecting Rachel over the years:

🔐 Account Safety Basics

• Turn on 2-factor authentication
  → I cannot stress this enough. My accounts get login attempts constantly. This is your first line of defense.

• Use a strong, unique password

🛡️ Control the Environment

• Limit or filter comments when needed

• Turn off comments on posts if things get weird

• Monitor DMs regularly

👀 Follower Check = Non-Negotiable

I review followers. Period.

If something feels off?
Blocked.

No explanation needed.

🌱 Age-Appropriate Evolution

What worked for “little dancer Rachel” is not the same for teenage Rachel.

And that’s okay.

Right now?

We’ve shifted to:

• Me asking permission before posting

• Adding her as a collaborator instead of forcing content

• Letting her be a kid first, dancer second

And honestly… it’s brought so much more peace into our house.

The Pros of Having a Dance Instagram

Let’s give credit where it’s due 👇

✨ Exposure

Opportunities can come from being seen

✨ Confidence Building

Watching progress over time is powerful

✨ Networking

Connections with other dancers, studios, and creatives

✨ Brand Opportunities

Rachel was an earring ambassador at one point:

• Free jewelry monthly

• Discounts

• Photoshoots

• Content features

And it all started with her account being public and active

The Cons (Because They’re Real Too)

Let’s not sugarcoat it.

⚠️ The Internet Can Be Cruel

I’ve had posts go viral… and not always in a fun way.

Comments about my kids?
My family?

Yeah… those got shut down real fast.

And I’ll say this loud for the people in the back:

👉 Your child’s mental health will always matter more than engagement.

Always.

⚠️ Screenshots Are Forever

Even if you delete something… someone may already have it.

That’s just reality.

⚠️ Pressure & Comparison

Follower counts
Likes
Views

It can turn into a scoreboard if you’re not careful.

Let’s Talk About “Growth” (The Right Way)

🚫 DO NOT BUY FOLLOWERS

Learn from me on this one.

I did it early on… and I regret it.

It looks real. It feels real.
But it destroys:

• Engagement rates

• Credibility

• Brand trust

Now? Everything we have is organic.
And it’s 1000% better.

🤝 Follow Trains… Meh

Are they terrible? No.
Are they meaningful? Also no (most of the time).

• You might meet a few genuine people

• But most are there for the follow, not the connection

And if your goal is:
👉 Brand deals or partnerships

Low engagement + high followers = 🚩 red flag

Brand Deals & Ambassadors… Let’s Clear This Up

Say it with me:

👉 If you have to pay… you are NOT an ambassador. You are a customer.

There is a difference.

✔️ Real Partnerships Look Like:

• Free product or meaningful perks

• Mutual benefit

• Ongoing relationship

🚩 Red Flags:

• “Pay to join” programs

• Minimal discount (10% off… really?)

• Promises of exposure with no follow through

We’ve been on both sides of this.

The good ones? Amazing.
The bad ones? Lesson learned.

Where We Are Now (Real Life Update)

Honest moment…

We’re not going all-in on Rachel’s dance IG right now.

Why?

Because she’s:

• A teenager

• Living her life

• Still figuring out what she wants

So instead:

• I collaborate her on posts

• Keep things updated without pressure

• Let her lead the pace

And you know what?

It works for us.

So… To Gram or Not to Gram?

Here’s your answer:

👉 Do it with purpose… or don’t do it at all.

If your dancer wants:

• Growth

• Exposure

• Opportunities

Then go for it… safely and intentionally

If not?

Skip it.

No guilt. No pressure.

Final Thoughts (From One Dance Mom to Another)

You are allowed to:

• Protect your child

• Say no to trends

• Block people without explanation

• Prioritize mental health over likes

And you are ALSO allowed to:

• Dream big

• Put your dancer out there

• Build something amazing online

Both can exist at the same time.

And if you hear a little voice saying “go for it…”

Do it the right way.
Do it safely.
And most importantly…
Do it in a way that still lets your kid be a kid ❤️

Until next time, TCDM Fam. 💙